Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Rachel Ray

Okay, does anyone else have the strange compulsion to watch and or buy anything Rachel Ray? I seriously think that she has some alien power over us! Either that, or somehow we were all hypnotized and her coined terms, "Yum-o" or "EVOO" put us all into a trance and we just can't turn away from the screen. How else do you explain the Rachel Ray phenomenom?

The woman is completely obnoxious, yet she has 5 TV shows - Rachel Ray, 30-Minute Meals, Tasty Travels, $40 a Day and Inside Dish, she has written countless cookbooks (one of which I own), she has her own magazine - Everyday with Rachel Ray, she has her own line of cookware (I have her Furi knife, which I totally love), she even has her own brand of olive oil, stock and dog food of all things! Thank GOD her ads with Dunkin Donuts and Nabisco are over...I don't know if I could handle it!








According to BloggingStocks, Ray's estimated worth is upwards of $100 million. $100 MILLION! That is just plain insanity! But I guess all the whoring herself out seems to be paying off. I mean, I think she currently has more jobs than Ryan Seacrest and those are some heavy loafers to fill (note the cleaver pun).

My last thought on Mrs. Ray...does anyone else want her to stop fighting it and just get fat already? God bless her for trying, but enough is enough! She always seems to be on the loosing end of her battle with the bulge and I think she would be much happier if she just let nature take its course. I can absolutely relate to her struggle, but I eat salad for God's sake! And reduced fat condiments! Come on now Rach - you are never going to be Gidada De Laurentiis. And now with the Food Network expanding its programing to include healthy option shows hosted by even more skinny bitches (ie: Ask Aida and Healthy Appetite with Ellie Krieger) how can you compete? I say, join the likes of Paula Dean and Ina Gardner and eat all the damn pasta you want sista!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Going Under the Knife

Did anyone watch SVU last night? It was a really great episode starring Matthew Lillard (with a scary 70's porn-stash) and the legendary Carol Burnett. Ms. Burnett was true to form as always, but what is up with her face?!


I don't understand why people can't just age gracefully. I can almost understand the whole botox thing for actresses in their 40's and 50's. Acting is a tough industry and you do what you have to in order to get work. But when you are in your 60's and 70's? Come on! That is just rediculous! No one beats Joan Rivers though. She is unrecognizable at this point. Her only grandson, sadly named Edgar, must be deathly affraid of her!

*In an unrelated note, I find it ironic and completely hysterical that Melissa Rivers married (then divorced) a horse trainer, ha!

To go to the other end of the spectrum, what is with young stars going under the knife? Scarlett Johanson (not my favorite actress anyway) admitted last year to undergoing plastic surgery. "I definitely believe in plastic surgery. I don't want to be an old hag. There's no fun in that." Insanity! Not only is it completely unneccessary for young people to have cosmetic surgery, but it is sending the wrong message to young people all over the world! It is hard enough with personal trainers and chefs, re-touching and airbrushing, but add surgery into the mix and we are creating a false sense of beauty for everyone to idolize. And there is no getting away from it! You see it in magazines, on TV, in the movies and Online.

I honestly think the cosmetic surgery thing has gotten out of hand. What do you think?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Start Your Engines!

After an extended hiatus (and 2 lay-offs) I’ve decided (with a little help from Jenn) to start up my blog again. I should have quite a bit to write about since my last post and I will do my best to keep the updates as regular as possible.

So I’ve found my new favorite show (with some more help from Jenn) and I highly recommend it. If you like any combination of the following: bad reality TV, drag queens, crazy costumes, lipsynching, random celebrity guest judges and awful sexual puns, you MUST tune in to Ru Paul’s Drag Race! The show can be found on the Logo Channel and for those of you with a DVR and or Comcast OnDemand, you are in luck!

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Drag Race is America’s Next Top Model on Acid. Imagine…if you dare, soft focus, dim lighting, bad disco music, Rue Paul NOT in drag, Santino (from Project Runway)…it is what ANTM should have been. And Tyra WISHES she had some of the great one-liners that Ru Paul has! “The time has come to lipsynch for your life!” – when contestants find themselves in the bottom 2, they each have to lipsynch the same song and whoever impresses the judges the most is safe. “Shantay, you stay” – that is for the winner in the bottom 2 contestants. “Sashay away” – that one is for the loser who is sent packing. And my favorite “And remember, don’t f*$#% it up!” – Ru says that little gem after giving the queens their challenge.

Its not too late to tune in as there are still 3 lovely ladies left, and thanks to the magic of TV and the Internet, all previous 6 episodes can be found online or OnDemand.

May the best woman WIN!